Ok, I’m gonna be honest…those weren’t too funny.
Give me a couple minutes…or days, and I’ll post some funny ones
Some may be racist, so if I offend anyone, I apologize in advance.
A black man was driving alongside a road at 1 mph and the speed maximum was 25 mph. A half hour later, a white man pulled up alongside him and he said: Anything wrong?
The black man said: No, I’m just waiting for this snail to speed up so I can pass him when the line is dotted.
The white man said: Why wait behind it when you can run over it?
Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear
Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair
well
Fuzzy wuzzy wasn’t very Fuzzy Wuzzy
Ewy Guwwy was a worm
a mighty worm was he
up appon a railroad track
a train he did not see
Ewy Guwwy
A Blonde, a Brunett, and a red head walk into a bar and get Drunk.
The Brunett asks the Bartender to call a cab. and he does.
The Red Head calls he friend to pick her up. and she does.
The Blonde asked the Drunk Trucker next to her if she could get a ride home. and she does.
But 9 months later, WHO had a baby?
lol the last one i just thought off the top of my head so it might not be that funny.
A pro juggler driving to his next performance is stopped by the police
The cop sais: What are you doing with these matches and lighting fluid in your car?
The juggler replies: I’m a juggler and i juggle flaming torches in my act
The cop: oh yeah? lets see you do it.
So the juggler gets out and performs his act perfectly
A couple driving by slows down to watch. Wow. sais the driver to his wife
‘’ im glad i stopped drinking, look at the tests they are giving now !’’
And some ehh, brain breakers? no teasers? ah well
Can you cry under water?
Who decided that a round pizza should be put in a square box?
Why are actors IN movies but ON television?
Why do we pay to get to the top of tall buildings, then pay to use binoculars to look at things on the ground?
If a deaf person goes to court, do they call it a hearing?
Doctor: I’m so sorry,
Man: About what?
Doctor: Your wife, is, dead
Man: My wife is dead?
Doctor: I’m really sorry.
Man: Don’t be, I have loads of spares!